Kim K. And Nikki & Jill

Sooo its been a while.... we have so much to catch up on... but first...

So remember The Real L Word season 1...



Remember the cutest couple... Nikki & Jill?

[caption id="attachment_632" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="Jill & Nikki"][/caption]

Well..... I MET THEM!! The other day, they came in the store, grocery shopping with Jill's mom (she lives around near us!.. the ladies live in LA) I was so excited! It was time for me to leave but we were slammed.. so like a good employee, I stayed. And then.. Jill walked up and asked me for a lottery ticket :) I just stared at her and was like "Are You Jill?... I love your show!!" They were super sweet and I am glad I stuck around for those extra 15 minutes. I tried to tell my co-workers but no one knew who they were.. We so need more gay people in this tiny town. :)

Anyways.. recently, we all saw the end of Kim Kardashian's marriage to Kris Humphries. I was disgusted by this, of course, because I am a lesbian. I am denied the right to marry because my marriage will obviously ruin the sanctity of marriage. However, Kim K., Britney Spears, and even Kenny Chesney, are allowed to legally marry for less than a year (or even less than a week!) for whatever reason they see fit.

Well, I guess Nikki & Jill had the same reaction to news of Kim K. as well. This was their public letter to her in the magazine "The Advocate".

Dear Kim Kardashian,

Like much of the world, we were made aware of the news of your impending divorce from Kris Humphries after just 72 days of marriage. We are sorry for any personal anguish this is causing you. No one likes to hear about hardships when it comes to matters of the heart.

That said Kim, we can’t help but wonder if your “sacred union” was indeed a ploy to boost the ratings of Keeping Up With The Kardashians, while earning millions of dollars from the media in the process.

That thought greatly disturbs us.

As businesswomen, we respect your entrepreneurial spirit. But using a wedding/marriage as a catalyst to further your brand recognition, your celebrity, and your wallet is truly hurtful to those of us who so deeply value the union and yet are unjustly denied the right.

Did you know that gays are denied more than 1,000 federal protections as a result of not being allowed to legally marry? Are you able to understand how devastating it is to love someone dearly, want to spend your life with them through a legally recognized and respected union, only to be denied that civil right because people in position of political power don’t think it’s “right”?

We were unlawfully wed in the State of California on October 9, 2010, where amongst dear family and friends, we vowed to love, honor, cherish, and respect one another. It was truly the most magical day of our lives. Yet despite how meaningful and genuine our commitment to one another was, that “I Do” was not enough to protect our relationship. We had to take countless measures to ensure that our honorable bond was guarded, in areas of healthcare, parenting, benefits, and taxes—just to name a few. We wonder if you appreciated just how many rights your marriage with Kris was afforded when you collected all those profits.

Kim, we have no doubt that a woman as smart, savvy, and beautiful as you will find love and marriage again. But for the respect of the millions of people who hear about it at every turn (many of whom you rely on to build your brand) please do take into consideration the uphill battle that so many of us have to fight for marriage equality. Perhaps you can demonstrate a bit more respect for the union next time around, instead of using it as a business gain.

We leave you with this idea: Why not take a portion of the millions of dollars you earned on your wedding and donate it to the Human Rights Campaign to help fight for marriage equality? It would speak very loudly.

This was very well said I think.. I noticed on their Facebook page, a lot of people were commenting saying "people shouldnt judge Kim because we don't know the details, and she deserves privacy!!" Umm.. hello?! She is on several reality tv shows depicting her life, and she is only famous because of the details of her life. If she wanted privacy, then she should have had a quiet wedding without all the camera crews!

Here are some recent fb status favs of mine..

"Dear E now that Kim and Kris are getting a divorce please stop playing her fairy tale wedding! Does she know how bad the economy is?"

"Dear Mr. President, if i promise to stay married longer than Kim K, can I marry my girlfriend and it actually be legal in all 50 states? :)" (this was on mine and a friend's)

And this pic was on fb as well...



I will also include the NOH8 pics from both The Real L Word & The Kardashians.... I love NOH8 pics!

[caption id="attachment_635" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="The Real L Word"][/caption]

[caption id="attachment_636" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="Jill & Nikki"][/caption]

[caption id="attachment_637" align="aligncenter" width="200" caption="The Kardashians"][/caption]

[caption id="attachment_638" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="Hear no evil, speak no evil, see no evil... Kardashian style."][/caption]

[caption id="attachment_639" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="Kim K."][/caption]

 

>Day 10 of 30.

>Something you are afraid of.

There's so much I am afraid of.

My biggest fear is what could happen to me or Jess, if one of us is really sick or dies. I am deathly afraid of one of us not being able to see the other if something tragic happens, simply because we aren't "married". God forbid something should ever happen, but if shes is in the hospital, I am afriad I wont be able to get to her. I am scared that I wont be "allowed" in her hospital room or to make decisions on her behalf. I think about this all the time and it breaks my heart. I know laws are supposed to be changing and that hospitals dont hold these rules anymore, but still. I worry about always having to defend my relationship to someone or my relationship never being taken seriously in these types of situations. I am so scared that when we have children, if one of us dies, that the other will have to fight to keep the kids we had TOGETHER. I also worry the one left behind will also have to fight to keep the house or any possessions we have together. We plan to have as many legal documents drawn up to protect each other from anyone taking anything from us. The documents/living wills will literally name every single thing so that there is no question. I dont think our families would do anything like this but you never know what a someone will do after losing someone they love. We will name each other power of attorney in all cases and even now list each other as emergency contacts. This is something straight couples rarely have to think about, and its so unfair. I HATE that my life is dictated by people I dont know and dont know me. My right to get married to a woman is MY business and no one else's... but thats another post.

Another fear of mine is that we will never have children. I am scared it will cost us way too much and that we wont be able to get pregnant. Adoption is something we plan to do anyways, but we both want to carry a baby. On that note, I am scared that we wont ever be approved to adopt simply because we are lesbians.

Fire. I have a fear that one day when we leave the house, it will catch on fire. The fur-babies are crated at night and when we are gone, and I worry that they will be trapped if the house catches on fire. Many times when I leave, I make sure the dryer isnt running and that there arent any blankets/clothes near outlets. I try to turn everything off (except the tv with cartoons we leave on for them to have some noise :) ) I cant leave them out of the crate because 1. they might tinkle on my floor, 2. it stresses them out because dogs feel they need to protect the house so they pace the house, and 3. they like their bed, its never a struggle to get them in there. Also with the fire, I am afraid I will lose the few pics I have of my dad. Even though, I have copies and they are loaded to facebook, I still worry. If we are home and there is a fire, I know I will get the babies (and the picture of me and my dad that sits on the shelf near their bed) out with us. I will risk my life to get my babies out.. I wont care if the door handle is hot ( like they teach in school) I am going to get them.

Less dramatic fears: I hate roller coasters. I dont like heights, small spaces, or crowded places (not like concerts or fairs, but stores with too many shoppers or restuarants with so many people you cant think!)

Jess's Fears are simple. She is afraid of flying and death. Her fear of flying is not that the plane could crash, she accepts that. She is afraid of crashing in the ocean and drowning or being eaten by sharks. ( That always make me laugh a little. :) )

>2 & 1/2 Years!!

>

We have been together 2 1/2 years today.

Seems like just yesterday we were texting and pretending

we didn't like each other at all.

Ha!

Even though deep down we were so hoping that the other

felt the exact same ;)

Every now & then I miss the old days of

flirting and butterflies.

I miss the "missing her" days

before we moved in together.

But most of days, I'm so thankful of where we are today.

Like being together so long that people actually believe

its real.

I know we all do it.

When someone says they're in a relationship

we all wait to see how long.

Because I guess the amount of time puts substance in that relationship.. lol.. idk.

So when they say "oh 3 months" you're probably secretly thinking

"pffft... lol... ok"

But when someone says

"we've been together for 2 years"

You will probably validate that relationship much, much stronger.

I love that we know where we stand in the relationship

and that this is forever.

"Legal" marriage or not.

We have started planning now for the hoops

we might have to jump through later on.

We know that at some point Jess will "try" to change her last name to mine.

We also know that the courts will want to see "validated" proof

that our commitment is real.

So we have our past leases and all of our bills in both names.

We have a joint checking account

(to which we pay all bills from)

so that the judge can see that we have already

assumed equal responsibilities for each other and each other's debts.

In any legal paperwork we fill out now,

we always list each other FIRST, as the emergency contact person,

& our parents are listed second.

We try to prepare ourselves for as many issues

that could be thrown at us later.

I realize that not everyone supports gay people or same-sex marriage

but we shouldn't have to "prove" our love & commitment

just because we are both women.

But that's another post for another day :)

Happy 2 1/2 years baby..

I love you always.

<3

>Spirit Day 10.20.10

>

Today,

In honor of the suicide victims,

we are wearing are purple.

Purple (Violet) in the gay flag means spirit.

We wear purple to raise awareness against anti-gay bullying.

And to let the kids know that

WE CARE!!

"It Gets Better"

>This Weekend is...

>

Too bad we both have to work and we're missing it!!!

Happy Pride!

>Wisdom teeth are a Bitch!

>So today Jess had her wisdom teeth cut out. It cost more than an arm and a leg!! But I got to be with her while they put her to sleep and when she woke up. They gave her the meds to make her sleep and she fought it as long as she could before finally closing her eyes. I think she just didnt wanna be alone in there and she knew that when she went to sleep I would be going to the waiting room. But the meds took over and she went to sleep. I kissed her forehead and told her I loved her and went to sit with her mom in the waiting room. When it was over, I went back there to get her and she reached for my hand and squeezed it so TIGHT.. And through nasty gauze and swollen lips she tried to tell me she loved me. :) Thats a moment I'll never forget. I leaned down, kissed her forehead again and told her I loved her. The Dr explained the surgery to me and treated me like I was her wife and not just a "friend" there to pick her up. Of course that meant everything to me because I was afraid I wouldnt even be allowed back there. But he was great... although the nurses were rather bitchy. urrgg! But we got her home and got her settled. I felt like her personal nurse. I can understand most of her grunts and groans without her really having to speak. It makes me feel good to know that I know my baby better than almost anyone and that Im confident in taking care of her. Her mom even told me she was glad I was here and she trusted me to take care of her daughter. Thats exactly what the girlfriend wants to hear. :) Most days I feel like her wife anyways. There isnt anything gross or disgusting I havent seen. Someone once told me that if u can survive seeing your "person" have the flu or some gastro illness then you can probably survive anything. Well Ive definately been there for all that! haha I dont think that stuff bothers me as much since I want to be a nurse. But at least I know I can handle all the grossness. I think the worst part of today so far was watching her throw up in the car and it was mostly just blood. blahh... but we survived. And shes sleeping somewhat peacefully on the couch recliner.

These are the days I know that I cant imagine being with anyone but her. I guess the fact that I realized this on the hard days with all the gross junk means something rather than realizing it on the special date nights with dinner and roses. HAHA! Nothing like blood and vomit to make you fall in love all over again. =]

>Kiwi. One Year. And The Research Paper!!

>

Our little apartment now has the presence of a furbaby!! My 4 year-old chihuahua, Kiwi, has come to live with us. When we moved, I didnt feel that it was right to take her (or my other chihuahua, Gypsy) because my mom has become extremely attached to them both. They are apart of her daily routine and I felt that she needed them. Over the past year, my mom has overcome Breast Cancer. There were days when the dogs were what got her out of bed and moving on day to day. Thankfully, she is in good health now and doing well. The chi-chis, however are now extremely possessive of her and constantly fighting with each other. Lately, they've been drawing blood and she couldnt bare to see them like that. Since neither of them are aggressive toward people, we opted to take one of them and let the other one stay. We considered every pro and con for who to take and who to leave. The obvious choice was to take Gypsy because shes younger and hyper whereas Kiwi is a little older and set in her ways. She prefers to sleep 18-20 hours a day. ;) But Kiwi is better apartment oriented because shes small and doesnt feel a need to run around outside. At my mom's, Gypsy has a fenced in back yard that she loves. So we decided on Kiwi. Our little baby is now asleep between us in our bed. =)

Today is our One year Anniversary!! We kept our celebrations low-key since bills are right around the corner. Thats fine by me because "night-in" dates our my favorites. We just grilled some chicken and are gonna watch some movies. Yay!!

For my english class, I have to write a research paper about a political issue that is timely and is important to me. I chose Equality for Gay and Lesbian Americans. duh.. =) I want my main points to be marriage, adoption/fostering, and serving in the military. I plan to show the hoops we have to jump through to have children and legally be prepared if we live in a state where gay marriage is banned. I have asked several follow bloggers to share with me their story about the families. Please feel free to share your opinions or ideas. This is a very important issue to me because its something I worry about. Im so afraid that if something ever happens to me, Jessica will have to fight to keep the kids we will have and everything we'll own. Not that I think, either of our families would do anything like that. But I still worry. All my life, I have wanted to adopt and foster children. I know that we will be great mommies and that we will provide a loving and stable home to our children and any children that might live with us. I just dont beleive my love for a woman will effect the way we raise our children. There are so many kids that need a home to feel safe and loved that it shouldnt matter if its a Mom/Dad, 2 Mom, 2 Dad or single parent household. All that should matter is the quality of life that child will have. So much to say and so little time to say it. The paper is due next Aug 4th. Any opinions would be great!!